Dear Mike & Liza,

My new hus­band has 2 boys from a pre­vi­ous mar­riage, aged 9 and 12.  I have no chil­dren.  This is our first Christ­mas together with the boys.  I hoped to incor­po­rate some of my fam­ily tra­di­tions into our Christ­mas this year, like open­ing one gift on Christ­mas Eve, a spe­cial Christ­mas break­fast my mom always made and unwrapped gifts from Santa.

My hus­band says his boys already have Christ­mas tra­di­tions of their own and I should make more of an effort to fit into their cel­e­bra­tion instead of try­ing to force them into mine.

What should we do?

Amanda, Pocatello